Life

tales from the food stamp office

I hadnt planned on blogging today buuuuuuuut the food stamp office has invoked a new post.

smh
me: are you registered to vote?
religious fool: no
me: would you like to register to vote today?
rf: no. you know the bible says we shouldnt vote or get involved with politics
**blank stare**
rf: it really does!
me: umm its your choice.
rf: rambling about bible stuff
me: is your address correct? anyone move in or out?
rf: OH! my son, he’s back home *she pulls out custody papers*
me: do you want to add him to the medicaid as well as your fs?
rf: yes! because I been meaning to come down and add him back to the case i kept forgetting. I really need to get him bac on b/c he needs patches.
me: patches?
rf: yea, you know! the patches to help you stop smoking
me: *blink blink* how old is your son?
rf: 16
**blank stare**
me: what grade is he in?
rf: 10th
me: is he attending school ft?
rf: well kinda.. see he just got suspended for 10days for drinking in class.
me: wow! thats kinda harsh huh?
rf: well he was mixing vodka and coke in the class and drinking
** blink blink**
*walks away* i had to regain my composure. it took EVERTHING in me to not say WTF!

me: do you rcve any child support?
rf: well i got 1 payment, but i wont be getting anymore *she reaches into her bag pulls out what looks like a greeting card*
because he just got locked up! and NOW he loves me. sending me cards begging me to drop the charges. but im not gonna do it. Im going file for divorce as soon as i leave here.
me: **blink blink** oh! ummm.. ooookay. so umm i just need u to sign and date here here and here

*she signs*

rf: thank you for not giving me a hard time and for listening
me: oooh umm youre welcome. happy holidays

Umm y’all. If you ever have to go into a office like mine. Answer the questions you’re asked. We REALLY don’t need to know EVERYTHING. If clarification is needed on an answer, we will ask. Do not take it upon yourself to volunteer any info. That is all

26 thoughts on “tales from the food stamp office”

  1. HEY Patrice!!!!

    LOL! I wasted water all over my desk from laughing so hard at that woman.

    I can only imagine what you go through at the office. Our DHS office here in MS should have a blog of its own. The workers are worst than the clients.

  2. If you were 16 in the 10th grade, knowing that chances are you were going to be 17 in the 10th grade, you’d be drinking, too! LOL

  3. I knew a kid that had his driver’s license in 8th grade. Rumor is he sometimes drove himself to school. Methinks Religious Fool needs to get her nose out of the bible and her foot in baby boy’s ass. Mixing drinks and needing stop smoking patches? Wow. Yeah, wow. *walks away like you were talking to me.* LOL.

    I’d want to come to your office as a client to see how weird I had to get before you cracked. What?! It would amuse me.

  4. I would not have told yo azz ish.

    There is only one religion that I know that frowns upon voting…

    but a little Jesus juice won’t hurt.

    Again, this is why I am spiritual and not religious…religion is man made.

  5. I would not have told yo azz ish.

    There is only one religion that I know that frowns upon voting…

    but a little Jesus juice won’t hurt.

    Again, this is why I am spiritual and not religious…religion is man made.

  6. Sigh…lord I feel you…I feel you. I”ve become the master at not the blink stare but the long……….. pause after they same something so OUT THERE that I want to shake the crazy out of them.

  7. I once posted a sign on my memo board that read “If I’m not asking, you shouldn’t be telling!” Working in an HR department provides lots of opportunity for folx to start volunteering alla their bidness. I’ll have to email you my latest sob story. It involves an employee, his wife and his new baby momma…….

  8. I once posted a sign on my memo board that read “If I’m not asking, you shouldn’t be telling!” Working in an HR department provides lots of opportunity for folx to start volunteering alla their bidness. I’ll have to email you my latest sob story. It involves an employee, his wife and his new baby momma…….

  9. I really don’t think I could work for Social Services. I just can’t believe the foolishness that comes up in there, on the other hand, yes I can. LOL At least it sounds like there is never a dull moment in your place of employment. LOL

  10. I really don’t think I could work for Social Services. I just can’t believe the foolishness that comes up in there, on the other hand, yes I can. LOL At least it sounds like there is never a dull moment in your place of employment. LOL

  11. Some religions have a way of taking certain scriptures and interpreting/converting them into mandated behaviors for their followers. I have many family members who do such.

    Seems like they need to spend more time with choosing people child rearing and mate choosing skills, huh? Not trying to keep them away from the vote.

  12. Came to your blog via Kim’s blog. Your stories are hilarious. I can’t believe the stuff people say to you. Too funny šŸ™‚

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