Life

ever been

Punched so hard in the gut that for a brief moment you think you’re dying?

Your vision becomes dark?

You see little flecks of light dancing around like stars in the sky… so close yet so far away

The pain isn’t immediately apparent… it takes awhile before your brain is notified of the pain.
But when it registers, all you can really think is WHY, why lord as you crumple to the floor in a heap.

Your breaths come in gasp.
Breathing should be easy, but its not.

There is fire in your belly. And a throbbing ache in your heart.

And at the moment all you can go is let the tears flow.

You want to be strong. Grit your teeth and bare it. Never let them see you weal. Not let them know they’ve hit your weak spot. that spot you try so hard to cover and keep shielded.

But you can’t bc the pain is there. It’s always there. Right there waiting on you to let your guard down.

Ever feel like that?

Its how I feel right now.

It’s okay though.

I’m strong.
Patrice you are strong. You can function with the pain. It will only make you stronger. You will win. Patrice don’t forget God’s word. He said he’ll give you the desires of your heart. His. Word won’t return void. Hold on to the promise. Have faith. Don’t let go of the promise, patrice. Don’t let go. Through the pain and the tears, Hold ON!. God is faithful. And in due season you will reap your harvest. Dry your eyes and keep trusting Him. Patrice don’t lose hope.

The pain is real. The tears are real.

But I refuse to be a victim.
Self pity is not a characteristic I claim.

*sigh*

12 thoughts on “ever been”

  1. Big Hugs, honey. Even through your pain, you write so beautifully. Adding a prayer to your prayer, this will pass and God will see you through.

  2. I feel that way sometimes. Just know that God has plans 4 you that will be revealed in his time.

    A friend of mine posted this on facebook today and it really encouraged me: “Change your attitude about the siutation until God changes the situation”

    If you’re a fan of gospel music, listen to “Be Encouraged” by William Bection. It’s awesome!

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